Women on Women hate? I've never heard of it...
Considering International Women’s Day was just around the corner, I thought I would bring up a particular subject that not a lot of women themselves may recognize, and that is women on women hate. Now not being so drastic by mentioning the word “hate”, many women on a day to day basis are seen to find other females, most likely those who they aren’t so familiar with, threatening and find a need to bring them down in some form. This is shown in grocery stores, when you see a mom looking “put together”, from her clothes to her full buggy of groceries that might as well all include healthy products. This can trigger thoughts like “an overachiever mom” or “a crazy perfectionist” from any of us.
Let me give you another example, for all you university folks out there. You as a female yourself, see someone you find super attractive at a party and think to approach them by sparking up a conversation. When you finally find the courage to go up to that smoking hot person, another girl beats you to the punch. Immediately, what I see in most cases is that the girl starts picking apart the other girls who had the same courage to go up to the attractive person. This can be from their hair, their outfit, how they talk and even go as far as calling them out by using derogatory words such as “slut”.
Does this sound familiar? Everyday we are somehow be put in a situation where women find the need to compete against one another to get the top spot. This is even shown in cheating scandals where the women entirely blame each other and the men somehow leave free and clear. Why is that? Society has put much of this “competition” essence into our lives, whether it’s promoting a new perfume to be seen as “the hottest girl in the room” or even releasing songs such as the infamous, “Don’t Cha” song by the Pussycat Dolls, insinuating the man leaving his girlfriend for another women.
You see a pattern here? Many men do not provoke the same behavior of competing against other men consistently, moreover they are seen going on with their lives or finding a distraction rather than shaming the other individual, which is simply based on our biased interpretations. Whether it’s the media provoking us or the normative culture that has been set for many years, we need a change and truly communicate better with one another. It is a cycle of wanting the best for ourselves, which is a rightfully so feeling. However when others, more specifically other women embody it, we result to jealousy. As women, we exude such a strong and positive power that can’t simply be used for jealousy or hate. What it should be used for is uplifting one another out of these societal standards that are truly subconscious at this point.
Want to know how? Supporting another girl or women can be easy as truly congratulating them on their new promotion, without having inside regrets or going up to that “put together” mom and gaining the tips and tricks she uses to lead the healthy lifestyle you might want to experience. Let’s turn that cycle around and uplift one another by asking other women specifically how they did it or supporting those that are kind of lost in their ways rather than watching them wallow.
This post had reminded me of a campaign that the famous youtuber, Lilly Singh had started a while back. Many may not know of her and other’s may not find her content intriguing, however, this video below is a message to all women, speaking without labels and promoting the positive behvaiour we all need to hear once in a while. Take a chance to see what I mention further, and ponder how you might be able to make little changes here and there or help another women out.